As I complete my thoughts about our trip, I have realized that there are some basic rules and things to know before heading off on a trip like this. Here I shall share them with you. My commandments of offshore sailing:
- Know thy stomach.
- Love thy crew. More importantly, love thy skipper. Even more importantly, love thy chef.
- Know thy medications and use them wisely.
- Keep thy garbage on board.
- Keep a log of the days sailed, unless one wants to lose ones’ mind.
- Gaff thy tuna not within the confines of the boat, unless one wishes to look like a murderer.
- Make thy food prior to storm arrivals.
- When in need of food seasoning, remove the salt from the rails and apply to thy dinner.
- Fill thy pockets like a hungry chipmunk so as to avoid unnecessary trips into the Galley of Lucifer.
- Keep thy boat flat for the chef. Unless one wants food from the floor.
- Do not break the head door. Unless one wants to do thy business in front of whole crew.
- Look not for land. Let it find you.
- If one stares at the horizon long enough, one will find all kinds of fun objects to see.
- Look not to the top of the wave that cometh from behind. Look ahead and ignore.
- Prepare thyself to be damp for the entire trip.
- Love thy tuna.
- Worship thy engine. It provides one with fresh water and escape from the becalmed sea.
- Sleep when thy can.
- Laugh from thy belly at least twice a day.
- Have a Newfie on board. If unavailable, find an East Coaster.
- Replenish thy snacks prior to Kiwi and above East Coaster discussing the meaning of life.
- Remove thy fishing lines from the sea prior to shark hour.
- Do not allow Curious George to open things without asking thy skipper first.
- Do not throw water bird looking for a rest off the boat. It will not fly. It will land in said water with a loud splash (sorry Simon).
- Showering is overrated.
- Watching shipping vessels in the night will almost always guarantee that one thinks one is on a collision course.
- Lightning striking within 1 km of boat is a good time to wake thy skipper.
- Thinking the moon rise is actually a shipping vessel about to hit thy boat is apparently NOT a good time to wake thy skipper.
- Be not surprised when a flying fish hits thy face.
- When one returns to civilization, be not surprised when the home shower continues to move for several days.
Hope you enjoyed our journey and you have learned a few things to put into your tool box if you ever head off into the great Big Blue!
Captain Penny